A Mother Needs Mothering Too

A Mother Needs Mothering Too A MOTHER NEEDS MOTHERING TOO The Untold Truth About Motherhood, Postpartum Depression, and the Journey Back to Yourself Achara Munachimso 2

A Mother Needs Mothering Too Dedication To every mother who has ever cried quietly while her baby slept. To the woman who smiles when people ask how she is doing, even though she is fighting battles she cannot explain. To the mother who loves her children deeply but sometimes misses the woman she was before motherhood. To the woman who feels guilty for being tired, ashamed for needing help, and frightened that admitting her struggles will make people question her love for her child. To every mother who has wondered whether anyone sees her beyond the role she plays. This book is for you. May these pages remind you that you are more than the meals you prepare, the clothes you wash, the babies you carry, and the responsibilities you fulfill. You are a woman, too. You deserve rest. You deserve understanding. You deserve tenderness. You deserve help when you need it. And above everything else, you deserve to be mothered, too. 4

A Mother Needs Mothering Too Author's Note Motherhood is often celebrated as one of the most beautiful experiences in a woman's life. Yet behind the polished photographs, congratulatory messages, and joyful announcements, some mothers experience emotional struggles they find difficult to discuss. Some feel overwhelmed; some feel lonely; some struggle with a changing sense of identity. Others experience postpartum depression without understanding what is happening to them. This book was written to bring those experiences into the light. The characters and stories in this book are fictional. They were created to explore experiences that some mothers may recognize, but they do not represent every mother's journey. Motherhood is different for everyone, and there is no single correct way to feel after childbirth. This book is intended for awareness, reflection, and encouragement. It is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Postpartum depression is a treatable mental health condition, and mothers experiencing persistent, severe, or worsening emotional distress deserve professional care. Postpartum depression can begin during pregnancy or at any time in the first year after childbirth. It is different from the "baby blues," which commonly begin a few days after birth and usually ease within about two weeks. If sadness, anxiety, irritability, hopelessness, loss of interest, guilt, 5

A Mother Needs Mothering Too changes in sleep or appetite, difficulty bonding, or trouble functioning continue beyond two weeks, get worse, or feel hard to manage, contact a healthcare professional. Do not wait two weeks if your symptoms are severe or you feel unsafe; seek help right away. Seek urgent help if you are thinking about harming yourself or your baby, feel unable to keep yourself or your baby safe, are hearing or seeing things others do not, feel unusually confused or detached from reality, or have extreme agitation, suspiciousness, or very little need for sleep. These can be signs of a psychiatric emergency, including postpartum psychosis. Do not stay alone. Put the baby in a safe place, ask a trusted adult to stay with you, and contact local emergency services or the nearest emergency department. If you are in the United States or its territories, call or text 988; elsewhere, use your local crisis or emergency number. Physical warning signs can also appear in the weeks and months after childbirth, and some are emergencies. Get medical care right away for severe trouble breathing, chest pain or a racing heart, fainting, seizures, a severe headache that will not go away or sudden vision changes, one-sided weakness, heavy bleeding, a fever of 38°C (100.4°F) or higher, severe belly pain, foul-smelling discharge, or swelling, redness, or pain in a leg. If something feels wrong, trust that feeling and call a healthcare professional or emergency service. If you recognize yourself in any of these pages, please remember that you do not have to face your struggles alone. 6

A Mother Needs Mothering Too Sources of further support are listed in "References and Further Support" at the end of this book. You are not a bad mother because you are struggling. You are a human being who deserves care. 7

A Mother Needs Mothering Too Contents Dedication Author's Note PART ONE — The Mother I Thought I Would Be 1. The Motherhood I Dreamed Of 2. The Day Everything Changed 3. Where Did the Old Me Go? PART TWO — The Pain Nobody Sees 4. When the Tears Would Not Stop 5. I Love My Baby, but I Am…