The Petty Omniscient

Jake Elmore is an entirely unremarkable man living an entirely unremarkable life — bad coffee, worse commutes, and a phone full of notifications he doesn't need. Unfortunately for him, someone has been watching every second of it for thirty-one years, judging quietly and constantly, and has finally decided to tell you all about it.

Narrated by an omniscient voice who does not like him — at all — The Petty Omniscient turns the mundane disasters of an ordinary life into a running commentary that's part character study, part roast. Sharp, deadpan, and relentlessly funny, this is literary comedy for anyone who's ever wondered what it would be like if your inner critic had its own book deal.